Hurricane Rita, the bitch.

Well, the Orchiectomy procedure on the 25th of August, happened to coincide with the arrival of Hurricane Rita (always hated the name Rita, especially the bitch landlord that I had).  I went home later that day of the operation, and that night Rita blew in.  I went back to my parents place for a more comfortable recovery, and a great nurse named Ellie. 

Pain to move, breath, and god forbid laugh.  The Darvocet helped a bit and I got used to it.  What sucked more than anything, was that only 2 hours into my recovery time, wouldn't you know Bitch Rita took out the power...and it was off for the next 2 1/2 days!  Now I had to recover with no A/C, 100% humidity and HEAT!  By the 2nd day it was really stuffy, uncomfortable, painful and of course I had no means of entertainment to take my mind off of my groin, except for People magazines, a radio & the occassional chats with mom, farts from Dad.

Not an ideal recovery, but I really appreciated Power when it finally came back on. 

My family has been great thru all of this and all checked up on me in person & via telephone.

August 25, 2005 - The Inguinal Orchiectomy

My birthday present...

The Orchiectomy

The actual removal is done by making about a 5 inch incision along the "bikini line" through the lower abdomen on the side in question--they do NOT cut through the scrotal sack whatsoever. Once the incision has been made, the surgeon pushes the testicle up through the pelvic region and out it comes. A snip here, a stitch there, and you're done before you know it. Average time on the table is about 45 minutes to an hour, but you should probably expect to stay in the hospital at least overnight. The operation is very simple and does not require any special expertise on the part of the surgeon. Note that while most people do seem to stay overnight, more and more guys are going home the same day. There is no problem with this, just make sure you get some pain killers before you leave the hospital, just in case...

I really don't have any hangups as far as losing any of my 'manhood' or the looks of it...many guys actually get prosthetic implants, but I can find better things to do with my money (that is, if I had any).

August 17, 2005 - Dr. Jeffrey Marks, Urologist appt.

For some reason or another, I didn't procrastinate in going to get this thing checked out, and I knew it was time to find a Urologist.  After telling my Dad about my symptoms, he found out that one of my brother Rob's friends is a Urologist and after confirming he was listed in my insurance plan, I made the appointment.

After donating some urine, the doc came in and saw my name, introduced himself and told me how nice my brother & Jilll are, & then he felt my balls (not an everyday-meet someone-occurence for me).  He said, "I don't like what I'm feeling."  I should have been offended, but I knew what he meant. He said that he suspected it to be Testicular Cancer.  Man, for someone who's always thinking about exiting this earth because life sucks, I got a real pit-of-the-stomach-type reaction.  SHIT...CANCER! 

The Ultrasound

It was time to go to the room down the hall where, and I kid you not, one of his PA's, a pretty female no less, told me to lower my pants & drawers and lay down on the cold table.  She then rubbed, what must have been KY all over the 'area' and rubbed it with this probe-thingy.  I'm glad that Anna Kournikova wasn't on my mind at the time!  Needless to say, the Ultrasound confirmed the diagnosis.  

With that, Dr. Marks said that we would need to remove said twin asap, and sent me off to get blood work (for markers) & a chest x-ray.  My Inguinal Orchiectomy was set up for the following week.  I walked out of the office, alone & stunned...and my damn groin was hurting from everyone fondlin' me parts!

In the beginning...

Sometime around the end of July (ish), I noticed that my left testicle felt abnornal.  It was somewhat bumpy & a bit sensitive to the touch.  I figured at the time that I'd just see if time would heal whatever it happened to be.  As a few weeks went by, it became harder, heavier (hung down lower that the right), and was more sensitive to the touch, while my whole groin area began to ache periodically.  At that point I figured, what could possibly go wrong with your testicles, other than Testicular Cancer?