I have no explanation. I have no idea why but for the past week, my blog has been inaccessible to me and to all of you - hence no updates. Since you've missed so much and since I'm only in Japan for another few days, there isn't much point in me continuing to update at this stage. However, I will continue to upload photos which you will be able to find here: http://s209.photobucket.com/albums/bb178/gctrionaem/Japan/

Apologies for this untimely end to my blog but be sure to check back next summer/autumn as I may very well be headed off somewhere else although I have no idea where yet. As a small consolation, I will leave you with the bit of an entry I tried to upload last time. Note that everything below happened last week now:

Last time I wrote I was in Osaka. I left as quickly as possible and headed for a place where foreign tourists rarely go: Matsumoto. This is a little alpine city up in the mountains of central Honshu. It wouldn't even have occured to us to go there were it not for the fact that Noride's host family from two years ago lived near there and she wanted to see them again. I'm glad we went because it turned out to be a very nice little city that rather reminded me of a Japanese version of Asheville. It was about as Bohemian as the Japanese get. It was nestled in between lots of huge tree-covered mountains and the train ride there was quite spectacular. The tracks wound their way around the sides of steep interlocking spurs with huge boulder-speckled rivers far below us. The tracks actually curved around bends so that the train banked slighly as it went around which was a very unusual sensation for a train. It felt almost like a very sedate rollercoaster.
This city is so isolated from the western world that we were constantly being stared at - a lot more than in Osaka. One middle-aged woman nearly crashed her car, turning around in her seat to stare at us as she drove by slowly. It's amazing that being white can be so amazing. However, we did happen upon a party of about 30 white English teachers under a bridge. They were barbequeing, they had a bonfire and some techno music playing and they were all hanging around under this bridge, drinking and speaking English. They probably represented 100% of the white community in the Matsumoto area. It was such a strange sight. They stared up at us as we walked by and we stared down at them and we were kind of smiling at each other thinking "hey you're white!" We thought about going down to them but for what? So we could say "Hey! We're all white! So how's being white working out for you?" You need more of a reason than sharing the same skin colour to invite yourself to a party!
We went cycling around town on some old school Japanese boneshakers that wouldn't have looked out of place gliding through the background of Chun Li's location in Street Fighter 2. Unfortunately though, there were no men repeatedly strangling a chicken. As we made our way home, a thunderstorm began and we got absolutely soaked. It was kind of fun actually! We took shelter for a bit in...an Irish pub! There really is no escaping. Of course the authenticity of this pub was questionable as we were the only white people there, we were shown to our alloted seats by staff and one of the staff was wearing a surgical mask for hygiene purposes. Also the music playing on the PA was elevator music. For some reason, everywhere you go in Japan has elevator music (except elevators). When I mean elevator music, I mean really crap electronic "relaxing" almost gameboy-like music. Anyway, for the record, a pint of Guinness cost the equivalent of 5.50euro in there but were mostly sold in half-pints! Blasphemy!
When we got back to our hostel and dried off, we ended up chatting to this half-Japanese, half-American (quarter Irish) lad called Patrick who was born in Japan but raised in Arizona and now living in Oregon. Apparently he got stared at just as much as us despite being half-Japanese and the locals were shocked to find that he had fluent Japanese. He could understand when they talked about him behind his back in Japanese too which I'm sure they're doing all the time with us! Japan really is a difficult place to be accepted in if even a half-Japanese person can't do it.
The Japanese are certainly the largest Asian race, physically. It's actually kind of a false stereotype that they're short. Sure there are some short people, but on average they're probably only slightly shorter than westerners and most men would be a bit taller than myself and some women too! The boys are very effeminate though. They really look after themselves, cary Louis Vitton handbags (I kid you not) and clearly spend hours working on their hair. This is a country where the boys look like girls and the girls are built like little boys. Sometimes you have to look twice to figure out from behind whether someone is male or female. They are more fashion conscious than any other country I have been to. Some of the get-up you'd see on lads over here! They'd look very silly altogether walking around at home anyway! We saw another t-shirt a few days ago that said "Star I need your man luv". Just thought you might like to know.
Technologically, Japan is years ahead of us and I can't understand why they don't export this technology because they'd make a killing on some of it. For example I saw an ad for an XD memory card with a 32GB capacity! For those of you who have no idea what that means, we still think 2GB cards are pretty nifty here. If that doesn't amaze you, how about taxis with electric back doors operated from the driving seat which open as if by magic or some other such trickery. It is as if there is some invisible ghostly coachman holding it open for you! All the cars seem to be fitted with talking GPS systems that map everywhere you drive and also play DVDs! It marks shops and restaurants and stuff on the maps too. They also have these trolleys for carrying crates but they're on a special kind of caterpillar track that allows them to go up and down stairs! And coolest of all, a few days ago, we were served an ice cream cone by a robotic arm! You put in a coin and the arm picks up a cone fills it with ice cream and hands it to you! It was so creepy! What can I say...Japan is weird!

Some further observations: the Japanese all drive around in little box cars (ie. cars shaped like boxes - ie. unattractive). Apparently this is because they're taxed on the length on their cars or something due to shortage of space! Also all Japanese salarymen tend to wear one colour of shirt all the time: white and only white! Their ties are all of sombre hues. They display none of the flamboyance characteristic of most western business fashion sensibilities. A splash of colour here and there wouldn't go amiss. Seriously lads, would wearing a blue shirt with a scarlet tie really be pushing the boat out that much? Would the machine really collapse if all the cogs didn't look completely identical?

Most of the subways in Osaka have "women only" carriages that men aren't allowed on to help cut down on groping while commuting, another bizzare Japanese social problem. I guess they have to let loose somehow and since there is very little crime, I suppose a bit of groping is just the price you pay for an efficient society. On a completely different note, despite Osaka being a much bigger city than Kyoto, I could count the amount of white folk I've seen here on one hand and I feel like I get stared at more here than in Kyoto. Admittedly, I was wearing my FABULOUS little red Hawaiian shirt today which is simply to DIE FOR so I'm sure many of the stares were covetous, quasi-lustful ones rather than curious, quasi-entranced ones.

I went to an onsen this evening which is like a hot spring spa only that it's a normal thing to do over here. There were loads of little marble pools all over the place to just hang out in and the water was roasting in all of them 40 degrees Celsius actually. And the saunas made ours look like igloos. They were 70 and 80 degrees celsius respectively! That's just wack! Then there was a freezing cold pool as well and people were lounging around comfortably in there too. Some of it was outside in a courtyard with a rock garden and everything and there were little gazebo pools where if it was too hot, you could just lean back outside the roof and the rain would fall on your face to cool you down. There were also little cradles submerged in the water that you could lie back in and various kinds of jets would shoot at you really hard and supposedly massage you although I found it rather uncomfortable. There was another little spot between two walls where there was a very weak electric current being passed between them and you're supposed to sit in the current and get mildly shocked! And that's supposed to be pleasurable or good for you or something! These baths are an etiquette minefield so I was trying to watch everyone else to see how they did things and not do anything at all until someone else did. There are loads of rules like where to wear shoes, where not to wear shoes, where to wear flip-flops, where not to wear flip-flops, where it's acceptable to be wet, where it's acceptable to dry off, where to put your facecloth. I knew some of the rules already. You HAVE to take a shower (while sitting on a little plastic stool in front of a mirror) before you get in . You have to soap up and you can't get in if you still have any suds on you. You take a cold shower after a sauna and apparently it's customary to empty a bucket of water over yourself just before you leave for some reason. Hanging out at the baths seems to be a social activity here. Dudes were just kicking it here, some of them were just lying back on tatami mats beside the pools taking naps and everyone was just letting it all hang out. Weirder yet was the fact that the women who worked there were free to walk in and out as they pleased to clean or whatever, and have a bit of a gawk at all the naked men. And everyone thought it was quite normal!!! What can I say? Japanese people are weird!

Today I visited the Osaka Peace Centre which is basically a war museum about all the atrocities commited by the Japanese in the last century. It was very blatant in accepting full Japanese responsibility for those attrocities and didn't try to dress it up in patriotic rhetoric or anything. It used words like "invaders, massacred, tortured" to describe Japanese acts - words one would expect Mongolians, Chinese, Koreans, Malaysians, Indonesians or Pacific Islanders to use. Clearly there is a lot of guilt about WWII, like in Germany, and it's a chapter of their history that the Japanese seem to be ashamed of but they won't let themselves forget it. I was told that this was a taboo topic here and not to try debating it so I won't (even if I could find a fluent English-speaking Japanese person who was a willing and able conversationalist). Probably the best way to put it in perspective though is that all of Asia seems to still feel about Japan the way the Irish felt about England until a decade ago (although that resentment was probably only justified to THAT extent up until about fifty years after the Cromwellian invasion). Some of the photos on display in there and some of the testimonials were chilling. I'm going to love wearing that T-shirt praising the old Japanese empire now...

Re yesterday's suicide discussion, I discovered today that Japan's suicide statistic for 2007 was 33,093. I'm guessing that's a lot - I don't really know. Apparently the figures have been steadily rising over the years and the main motivations have been lonliness, social isolation and work fatigue, which pretty much confirms all of my speculation yesterday. The increased suicide rates are roughly proportional to the increased average working hours over the last two decades. Apparently, many businessmen work all day, everyday, only coming home very late to sleep and starting very early the next day. I wish the Japanese service industry had the same attitude because a lot of places seem to just take random days off. The rate of suicide is highest among the 30-50 age bracket unlike Ireland where it's mostly men in their early twenties. Presumably men in their early twenties here have yet to have their hopes and dreams worn down by the relentless routine of Japanese office life. So what have we learned from these statistics? For a happy and healthy life, do as little work as possible, and focus on having as much fun as possible and making everyday as different from the last as possible. Sure I could have told you that! When you die you'll wish you spent more time with your friends or doing crazy stuff. You won't be lying on your deathbed cursing the heavens for not granting you a few more hours in the office. You'll wish you'd spent your time in college partying and your summers travelling, so I hope you did/are/will...It's a little more difficult to put that philosophy into practice after college but I suppose that's a challenge we all have to meet head on...New photos up at http://www.flickr.com/photos/gctrionaem/sets/72157605693919687

After my first day in Osaka, I have realised that Kyoyo was Japan's idea of Kilarney which is worrying becuase it's a city that's bigger than Dublin. Osaka dwarfs Kyoto and to me, represents all the negatives of Japan. It's massive, concrete, flashy, materialistic and seems like a horrible place to live. It's just skycrapers and suits. Don't get me wrong - it's got all the trimmings that a major city should have - cinemas, aquariums and manufactured tourist attractions. However, most of them are deserted and instead, everyone just mills around the infinite shopping centres. There are a number of museums and art galleries but these are not what the city is about. It is devoid of any real culture. It also seems to be a little more run-down and less modern than Kyoto. There are enough museums and attractions to keep us distracted for the two days we're here but I'd hate to imagine having to live here. There are no charming little side streets, back alleys or street performances. I've started to notice how everywhere is suicide-proofed. Anything tall has lots of barriers and spikes. Apparently Japan has a huge suicide problem and this city makes it easier to understand why. In a city like this where the only thing to do is go to work, go home, watch TV and sleep, it makes it more difficult to find meaning in life and the repetitiveness of the place is depressing. Efficiency isn't everything! The problem is, this city has no soul! That's just my impression after one day though. It does seem to have a bit more of a nightlife than Kyoto at least although I haven't sampled it. I suppose governments and city planners think that if they put an entertainment district here and there around a city, this will keep the residents happy but you can't plan a happy city. There's no formula. It all depends on the people - it's up to the people in a city to be creative and motivated enough to make their city a vibrant place to live and it's up to the city authorities to facilitate this wherever possible. I don't know who is to blame for the lack of soul, the residents or their government. I don't even know exactly what the ingredients of this so-called soul is. All I know is they haven't got it despite having parks, shrines, sports facilities, art galleries, museums, music bars and every other thing you might think would be required to inject life into a city. There is no formula for the buzz you get in certain cities - you either have it or you don't. Osaka doesn't have it. Many large Asian cities don't have it. Hong Kong definately has it. Singapore arguably does. Hanoi probably doesn't while Saigon does. Bangkok has it while Vientiene and Phnom Penh don't. Brisbane, Sydney and Melbourne have it while Cairns and Townsville don't. New York has it while Myrtle Beach DEFINATELY doesn't. London has it while most of Wales doesn't. Paris and Rome definately have buckets of it. Cork, Galway and Dublin have it and I haven't been in any other Irish city with a distinct lack of it. Is this the most judgemental and poorly thought out entry I've ever written? Possibly but I'm open to being proven wrong and who knows what tomorrow will bring. That will be my second and last day in Osaka. New photos up at http://www.flickr.com/photos/gctrionaem/sets/72157605693919687/

Today we went to see a bunch of those Shinto arches. There were hundreds of them which you walk through like a big vermillion tunnel that snakes up the side of a mountain. It was cool for the first few hundred metres. Trees kick ass. They should have them everywhere cos they keep you cool, mostly dry and not sunburned. Yay. However, the disadvantages of trees include the fact that they can give the strategic upperhand to hostile monkey troops. As is becoming increasingly clear as you read this, I don't really have anything to say today cos I didn't really do that much today. I tried to visit Kyoto International Manga Museum which would have been really cool except that it's closed on Wednesdays. Wednesdays! What's closed on Wednesdays?
For some reason, it's really cool to wear T-shirts with English slogans here. The only problem is that because there's so little English fluency around, the slogans rarely if ever make any sense. For example today I say a girl with a T-shirt that said "Even a worm will turn". What does that even mean? Seriously! Another girl was wearing one that said "Alcoholic go to Meetings". And she obviously had no idea what it meant...That would probably actually sell quite well in Ireland. It's such a common occurance that I just had to buy one to confuse people with when I get home, because I already had a T-shirt printed up for myself a few years ago with "Quack" written on it for that very purpose. So I bought one today that says "Kingdom of Order - Get filed in your field of interest." Ok...thanks for the tip...I'll get right on that.
The thing about coming to Japan is that it involves becoming a child again in that you have no idea how to behave and have to learn everything from scratch, like how to talk, eat, act...everything. It's been a very refreshing learning experience so far, which I think is what any good holiday to anywhere should be. Everyone still wears Kimonos for various kinds of formal events so you'll often see the odd person walking around in a kimono among hundreds of business suits and nobody bats an eyelid. You have to walk much more slowly and sit much more carefully when you're wearing a kimono and it straightens up your posture so people wearing kimonos always seem to move very gracefully with great fluidity. Last night I was sitting on a subway wearing a Carolina Panthers NFL jersey next to a lady in a kimono who was texting on a phone so sophisticated that it made mine look like a brick and I wanted to take a photo of the weirdness of that moment but knew I just had to sit quietly and experience it. It was such a convergence of east and west, old and new, all in the same moment and I think it really encapsulated Japan as a nation in the 21st century. There's an keen respect for history but an urge to move forward at the same time, there's a nod to Western culture while maintaining national culture and I think that's quite a unique dichotomy to find in any country. Tomorrow morning I'm off to Osaka, the second biggest city in Japan with a population somewhere around the six million mark. If Kyoto transport was difficult to figure out, Osaka will be real fun to get around! A few new photos up at http://s209.photobucket.com/albums/bb178/gctrionaem/Japan/ PS. This entry has nothing to do with tenacity but I needed another T noun for the title!

I have yet to hang out properly with any Japanese folk and get to know them which is really frustrating my attempts to get to know this country. It seems very closed and the Japanese, while very friendly in a formal kind of way, seem aloof most of the time. Yesterday, a guy tried to convince us to let him drag us around in his rickshaw. He had very good English and was actually very funny. He was very persuasive and put on a bit of an act for us. He is the only Japanese person I've met so far that actually cracked a joke with me so they definately do have seome sense of humour if we could just break the translation barrier. Obviously they're more likely to have a bit of craic when they're drinking so I'll have to look out for opportunities to get them "socially lubricated". The language thing is more of a problem here than probably anywhere else I've been bar China. Japanese people study English from eight years of age but unfortunately, seem to do so in the same way that Irish people study Irish from age four, which means that the majority can neither understand nor speak the language or alternatively if they can, they are so self-conscious speaking to foreigners that it's just too much for them to try to understand either your English or attempts at Japanese. They're all lovely but they just need some courage, of the Dutch variety or otherwise.

I often wonder what they think of foreigners and when I see the way many Americans carry themselves here, I worry about being tarred with the same brush. There are way more Americans here than in any Asian country I've been to, probably because they pull more weight in this Asian country than any other. The Japanese, as should be obvious at this stage, are usually fairly reserved (when sober), but many Americans I have seen don't really seem to have adapted much to the Japanese ways of behaving and speak just as loudly as they would at home when it sometimes seems inappropriate to do so. They draw attention to themselves everywhere, as if being white wasn't conspicuous enough already. I carefully watch the controlled expressions of the Japanese for reactions. They are a mask of Steven Seagalness. I can tell they're rolling their eyes inside their heads though! The Japanese never seem to argue openly which some foreigners don't seem to get.　There was a misunderstanding today with an Italian woman who felt she wasn't receiving adequate customer service. In fact she just wasn't conforming to a particular system of doing things so she wasn't going to get anywhere. She complained loudly nevertheless, which resulted in all the female staff looking very worried and trying to explain to her how it works, while saying things in Japanese to each other that was probably slightly less polite. One male member of staff didn't have the patience for this foreign ignorance as was slightly more visibly irate eventhough the words he used were still technically polite, they were delivered in a manner that left no room for negotiation. The Japanese want to resolve disputes　in a way that allows all parties concerned to save face. When Westerners argue they want to win and aren't as concerned about causing a scene. This results in culture clashes such as the one above. That's my take on things anyway. I may have misinterpreted the Japanese way of doing things as I'm sure I've done in the past few days on a few occasions.

Today we checked out the Imperial Palace. Kyoto used to be the old capital and seat of the Emperor. We also saw the "Golden Pavilion" which is actually golden as you can see from the photos. I wanted to see it because some Japanese guy made a film about it which I saw on TG4 a few years ago. Unsurprisingly, it was a rather weird film which was allegedly based on a true story about a monk who had a very unhealthy obsession with this temple that drove him to burn it to the ground. Of course it doesn't make sense! Then we went to see a famous rock garden with all that meticulously raked sand around it. Apparently, the rocks are positioned so that you can't see all of them from any one location around the garden. Then we checked out the local fish market. I was expecting something like the Thai fishmarkets I'd been to but it was way classier. Most of the fish came pre-killed for you and everything. There were also octopi (yeah it's a word), a wide variety of mollusks and other such sea-creatures that you would only ever put in your mouth for a dare. I soon found myself wandering cautiously into a pachinko parlour. Packinko is like a kind of gambling pinball where you have no control over the outcome of the game. The goal is to win loads of pinballs which you can trade in for money but it's more a game of chance than skill. The Japanese are addicted to it for some reason. I walked in and the sound was deafening. Hundreds of steel balls whirling though bleeping machines just sounds like a huge roar. Like most things Japanese, I had no idea what was going on and after spending the equivalent of 60c trying to get rid of ten steel balls, I cut my losses. They also had normal arcade games in there and there were little huddles of Japanese teenagers gathering around players to watch them. It was, of course, weird. I should mention that they have Tekken 6 in arcades here! I didn't even know it existed! There are new characters and the graphics are UNREAL in that they're actually quite nearly real! Why do they get all the cool stuff before us in Japan!

              We finished off the evening with a traditional Geisha stage performance (tourist trap). They arranged flowers for us, poured tea, danced around, played music and manipulated puppets…all that kind of carry on. Some of the music made so little sense to a western ear that it actually wouldn't have sounded out of place at all on a late Tom Waits album. (If you don't know who he is google him now!) To top it all off, I now have a very mild sunburn after another really hot day. It's probably about time. New photos for your viewing pleasure up at http://s209.photobucket.com/albums/bb178/gctrionaem/Japan/　

What a　day!　I've　been　walking　around　the　outskirts　of　Kyoto　all　day　getting　a　look　at　some　of　the　most　sumptuous temples I've　ever　seen　in　some　of　the　most　lush　surroundings　ever.　Kyoto　is　built　on　a　plain　that's　nestled　amongst some　mountains　which　are　covered　in　forests　of　Japanese　Cypress　and　Sitka　and　it　is　on　these　mountains,　in　these　forests　that　they　have　built　some　of　the　most　beautiful　temples　and　meticulously　maintained gardens in　the　world.　 We found all the best spots because we were being guided by a Japanese friend of Noride's who she had stayed with last time she was in Japan. Eventhough　it　was　really　hot　today,　the　forest　kept　me　cool　so　I　was　able　to　fully　appreciate what I was seeing. Warm slow-moving breezes flowed tenderly around me like melancholy invisible fingers absentmindedly playing with the hair on my arms, which I am baring with no visible adverse effects so far (in response to my tattoo).

            On the other end of the scale entirely, another feat of Japanese architecture was the Kyoto train station which is so huge that we didn't even see most of it when we first arrived. It should be a tourist attraction in itself because you can get all the way up to the ceiling hundreds of meters above the floor and walk along a suspended corridor which provides an amazing view of the city. It's the quietest part of the station and we were pretty much alone up there apart from a few window washers rappelling on the glass roof. Instead of wasting another thousand words on either this building or the temples, just look at the damn photos I spent so much time taking and uploading. I can't be describing everything for ye! I have to get back out and experience it!

              Everything in Japan is tiny…and I mean EVERYTHING!!! They seem to love it that way. They actually get pleasure out of seeing something really small either because they find it cute or technologically advanced. That's all well and good until they start messing with my daily dose of tea. I was given a tiny little cup of tea this morning. In the evening I went back and asked for a "bigu cupu" and pointed at the big cup. A worried expression overcame the girl's countenance and she said "Tea onry smallu cupu! Vely solly!" I turned on the Cork charm and patiently explained that she could just take one of these bigger paper cups (which are the same size as a regular cup at home) and just put more water in it. She looked confused and then said "You wait here…" She went to check with her manager and after some debate came back looking delighted and gave me a big thumbs up and said "Is OK! No probrem! Arigato gozaimaaaaaaaas!" Japanese girls sound so cute when they speak Japanese!

              I get the feeling that Kyoto is kind of like the Cork of Japan in that it's a fairly small city (by Japanese standards – it's still bigger than Dublin). In comparison to Tokyo, it feels much more relaxed and scenic. They're mad for bicycles here. They're all riding round on these dodgy looking old boneshakers and they're allowed to ride on the pavement which means you have to keep your wits about you. Seeing all the bikes around the place really makes it feel like old Japan.

              Last night we went to an Irish pub where a bunch of Japanese lads were playing a trad session! Seriously! We were the only Irish people in there and there were actually Japanese people playing trad and enjoying it and they were actually alright! It wasn't a cheap imitation or anything – it was real trad. They wouldn't win the All-Ireland Fleadh or anything but they were competent. Then I went to an English pub only because they had internet and got talking to a group of rather inebriated Japanese folk. It was the first time I'd seen Japanese folk letting their hair down at all and it was quiet a relief to see that they could relax and have some bit of craic when they put their minds to it. They translated the Japanese on my T-shirt for me and I was relieved to discover that the slogan was complimentary to the Japanese. It praised the pre-World War II Japanese empire. I was slightly troubled when I remembered that I had worn this in Hong Kong the day before! I decided I'd chance it when I had some drunk Japanese people and rolled up my sleeve to see if they could read my harm. They didn't recoil in horror but instead ooh, aahd and peered at it with interest so I'm beginning to think that tattoos are no longer as taboo as they used to be. They tried to buy me drink and get me to hang out but unfortunately, I had to go. Then I stumbled upon a street performance by various groups of singers on a street corner. They were basically barbershop quartets except there were usually six of them, often including a girl or two and they sang lots of different genres of music, all in "Engrish." They were amazing – it was hard to believe the whole thing was being done by voice alone without a single instrument. One guy would be beatboxing away while a bass did the bass bum-dee-dums and one guy even gave a convincing electric guitar solo with his mouth. They seemed to competing against each other and there was something else going on too because there were people going around the audience giving out flyers about the various bands. I left Noride there for about half an hour and when I came back I asked if she had figured out what was going on yet. She said "no…but does it really matter." That kind of sums up Japan. I'm rarely sure of what's going on but I'm loving it anyway! The last of the photos from Hong Kong are up at http://www.flickr.com/photos/gctrionaem/sets/72157605593888763/ and photos from Japan are now up at http://s209.photobucket.com/albums/bb178/gctrionaem/Japan/

My first  day in Japan has thrown up many weird and wonderful sights and the only way to explain them all is that Japanese people are just plain weird and that is about the extent of my analysis of the Japanese psyche. Granted, this rather uncomprehensive conclusion was reached without actually talking to any Japanese people for more than a few minutes but trust me, they're weird.

Last night was my first extremely confusing forray into this culture and it so puzzled me that despite my extreme jet lag, I stayed up until 1AM just scratching my head trying to get to grips with this strange system. Japan is best understood as just that, a system, and a very complex one. Everything has its place in this system and any deviation from it is unthinkable. When we landed we took a train straight into the centre to our hotel because it was late and we were exhausted so we didn't really see any of Tokyo. I spent my first night in a capsule hotel, which for those of you unfamiliar with this uniquely Japanese concept, is basically a morgue for people to sleep in. Instead of a room you get a little box not unlike a large hi-tech coffin which is stacked amongst dozens of others. For the equivalent of about 25 euro, you get the privelege of lying in your box. There's a tiny little TV in there and not much else. Japanese TV is the first piece of evidence of their weirdness. I won't bother going into detail on this baffling media but suffice to say they like mindless game shows. Anyway, apart from this little coffin, you get a miniscule locker to put your stuff in and there's a communal bathing area where a bunch of naked guys basically hot-tub it together in a totally not gay way. Apart from all the naked Japanese men, it's actually quite a relaxing experience. What I was most afraid of in this hotel was messing up on the extremely complex protocol. Most signs  were in Japanese but there were one or two in English listing a few dos and donts. Japan has more dos and donts than anywhere I've been and many of them don't immediately make a lot of sense. At check in you are issued with two disposable toothbrushes, two tiny towels and a yukata, which is a light cotton robe that you're supposed to wear around the hotel. You're supposed to leave all your clothes in your locker the whole time, which I couldn't get my head around because my locker was four floors away from my coffin so I had to get an elevator if I wanted anything from my bag. You have to tie the left side of your yukata over the right or else it's a bad omen or something and you'll piss people off. Your shoes are locked away at reception as soon as you check in and you can't have them back until you check out! You:re supposed to walk around barefoot except in the toilets where you're supposed to wear the communal flip flops! Not doing this is very much frowned upon apparently. There are hole in the ground toilets and then there are the hi-tech toilets you've all probably heard about that play gameboy music to cover up natural sounds and shoot water up where the sun don't shine. Luckily the toilets in this hotel were normal. The standard issue pillow was literally, and I mean literally, a bag of pebbles. I cannot stress enough how much my pillow was a bag of pebbles. I was so exhausted though that I slept quite comfortably. It was actually quite cosy in my little coffin and not claustrophobic at all. However, there was some lad about three coffins away snoring so loudly you could have heard him in the elevator. I reckon he actually lives in that coffin all the time because his wife kicked him out, unable to cope with the sleepless nights anymore. While the concept of the capsule hotel is typical of Japanese efficiency, I rather resent the implication, that everything I need as a human being can be reduced down to a tiny little box. You see, in my Western mind, everything revolves around me. Conversely, the Japanese obviously are more concerned with keeping the machine running smoothly and this means making personal sacrifices for the greater good. When everyone does this without exception, which they actually seem to do, this small densely populated country runs more efficiently than any other I have seen, but to me, this approach lacks the essence of humanity itself. Perhaps, my perceptions of freedom, autonomy, liberalism and everything ele that I believe to be integral to being human is merely fed to me by western culture and may seem as absurd to the Japanese as theirs do to me. Maybe there is no objective essence to humanity at all...but let's not get too bogged down in post-modernist philosophy...One thing I do love about Japan and that I can actually relate to is their obsessive attention to detail. They share my love of symmetry and parallel lines and take considerable care when presenting something to you, that everything they are giving to you is neat and unwrinkled and as it should be, whether they're giving you money or cutlery or food. Here I am not a "neat freak". Here I'm actually comparatively messy!

So my first night in Japan passed off rather successfully without committing any major faux pas...or at least it think it did. The thing is with the Japanese, they're so unfathomable, you never really know what they're thinking so you could have inadvertantly been offending them left, right and centre and they'd just smile awkwardly. I'm trying to get used to the constant head dipping everytime someone acknowledges me. I wonder if I'm bowing correctly. I had learned a few basic Japanese phrases to get me by but unfortunately, I don't even understand when people say these because they speak so quickly that everything they say sounds exactly like "adgaioblignneisaiiiiieee". The last vowel is always drawn out and the intonation goes sliding upwards. I smile weakly and say something stupid in English. Japan has been one of the most difficult countries for me to get around so far despite their extremely well-developed transport system. This is because this system, like every other Japanese system, is extremely complex and mostly in Japanese. Navigating the streets and even the trains has been surprisingly difficult. Of all the countries I've been to, I really should have brought a Lonely Planet book to this one but I said I'd chance it. We spent most of the day today just trying to get from A to B and got very little done. First thing in the morning, we took the Shinkansen Nozomi (Superexpress Bullet Train) to Kyoto (we're leaving Tokyo till the end of the trip because we have to fly home from there anyway.) I don't know what speed it goes at or anything but it was fairly lively alright. It did a journey that Iarnrod Eireann would probably have spent about six hours on in two and a half hours. Along the way we saw what Japan looks like. Skyscrapers gave way to sprawling higgeldy piggeldy housing estates and they didn't really end at any point. They don't really have much countryside in Japan. Any spare inch that isn't built on has a little ricefield squeezed into it. The only untouched parts are the dense bamboo-covered mountains that are too steep to build on. Everywhere else is just houses, skyscrapers or industrial plains with belching chimneys. I'm assured that there are national parks though where we will be going to see some of the countryside that they put in the brochures. The weather has actually been fine so far - not a drop of rain although it's very cloudy and the temperature is very comfortable; only slightly warmer than Ireland was when we left.  So no thunderstorms, typhoons, earthquakes or volcano erruptions just yet but I don't want to jinx it!  When we got to Kyoto, we met our Hospitality Club host, Makoto (who's a middle-aged dude) and he drove us back to his apartment where we'll be staying for the next four nights. He's actually moving back into his parents house for those four nights so we can have his apartment to ourselves! What a legend! Then we went to check out the sights. Unfortunately, it took us quite a bit of time to figure out the trains so the only sight we got to check out in the end was a ridiculous period village where everyone dressed up as samurai and such and pretended to be living in the "olden times". Not just the employees either, some teenagers who were visiting were dressed up in the weirdest get up ever. They looked like they'd just walked out of Yu Gi Oh or something. I can't describe it just check out the photos. The only explanation: Japanese people are just weird! (I'll upload some photos of this fair land as soon as I get a chance.)

As the title suggests, I'm back in Hong Kong. I have less than 24hours here and must soon spend several of those sleeping as I'm exhausted after the flight. It's been great seeing this beautiful city again though and reminiscing about good times last summer. Leah has been a predictably gracious hostess and her mom was delighted to see me again. She made us a huge Cantonese dinner and then we all played piano to each other for the evening. Noride seems in awe of the city though I survey it with the practised eye of a local by now. I've seen it all before and revell in seeing it all again. I show it off as if I built it with my own two hands. It's such a great city. I'd be perfectly happy to live here for a year or two. The heat has been unbelievable given that I'm coming straight fom Ireland this time and it's June rather than September like last time I was here. We're also being treated to random and torrential downpours of vindictive rain but it adds a bit of excitement to walking around. I haven't seen anything new really although I did notice signs around the place that I didn't notice last time encouraging citizens to be nice to each other and to take care of their health and be sure to get plenty of sleep! I found that a bit weird but nice. Is the government my mom? As long as they don't actually force us to go to bed early, I appreciate their concern. I really don't have anything else to say on Hong Kong except to say that it's reassuring familiarity has eased me nicely into this trip and it's been a lovely start to the holiday. Boring but true. I look forward to the comparative foreigness of Japan tomorrow night. There are a few photos up at http://www.flickr.com/photos/gctrionaem/sets/72157605593888763/  

A brief new chapter in this totally excellent adventure is about to begin. Tomorrow I will board a flight back to Hong Kong, from whence I shall continue to Japan on Saturday. This will be the beginning of a short two week holiday in that country which I hope will be a source of some interest or amusement to those of you who happen to rediscover my totally excellent adventure or indeed to those of you discovering it for the first time.

            For returning readers, the last you heard of me was when I got home from Hong Kong last September. For the sake of completeness I will fill in the gaps between then and now. I completed my final year in college rather uneventfully and it was with a sense of ambivalence that I finished my final exams two weeks ago. I already miss UCC terribly but am happy to have finished exams for now. I am now working for the time being in a tax law firm in Cork, which also inspires considerable ambivalence in me. Needless to say, tax law is not the most interesting area in which one could work but it is a job I can shamelessly put on a CV. Nevertheless, my leaving the office to resume my totally excellent adventure is a prospect that fills me with a sense of growing excitement and urgency akin that inspired by watching the fuse on a massive firework slowly fizz away. Basically, I am desperately in need of a holiday. I am leaving Ireland at its hottest and most pleasant and facing Japan in the rainy season, which, apparently, is currently enjoying some rather tempestuous weather featuring thunder and lightning. I have to make life difficult for myself!

            Upon discovering I am going to Japan, everyone asks why, a question that puzzles me. Does one need an excuse to go on a holiday? My Japanophilia began many years ago with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and it is an interest that has not waned since – an obsession that will finally culminate cathartically with me actually visiting the country. That's the plan anyway. In preparation for the trip I have been studying the writings of some of the earliest Europeans to successfully sail to Japan to try to understand the inevitable dichotomy between Japan and the west in its proper historical context. My study has been most illuminating and has further whetted my appetite for the exotic secrets of the land of the rising sun. I hope I will not be disappointed. I expect to find a people and a set of customs that I know only from books and films and if they are not as unusual and different as I have been promised, I shall be most irate! It is the Japanese psyche that I most seek to understand; their communitarian outlook, their emotional restraint, their extreme humility and the subtlety and infinite layers of meaning in their communication. This will be no mean feat given the language barrier. I hope my experience will be similar to Bill Murray's in "Lost in Translation" but perhaps a little more cheerful and less decadent.

            I have been searching for another travel anthem for this summer. Loyal readers may remember "Carolina on my Mind" and "Shiver Me Timbers" from previous years. Some generic examples that have crossed my mind include "Tokyo, I'm On My Way" and "Turning Japanese" but I have settled instead on another Tom Waits song, the much more vague and poetic "Foreign Affair," the lyrics of which I have provided below.

when travelling abroad in the continental style

it's my belief one must attempt to be discreet

and subsequently bear in mind your transient position

allows you a perspective that's unique

though you'll find your itinerary's a blessing and a curse

your wanderlust won't let you settle down

and you'll wonder how you ever fathomed that you'd be content

to stay within the city limits of a small midwestern town

most vagabonds i knowed don't ever want to find the culprit

that remains the object of their long relentless quest

the obsession's in the chasing and not the apprehending

the pursuit you see and never the arrest

without fear of contradiction bon voyage is always hollered

in conjunction with a handkerchief from shore

by a girl that drives a rambler and furthermore

is overly concerned that she won't see him anymore

planes and trains and boats and buses

characteristically evoke a common attitude of blue

unless you have a suitcase and a ticket and a passport

and the cargo that they're carrying is you

a foreign affair juxtaposed with a stateside

and domestically approved romantic fancy

is mysteriously attractive due to circumstances knowing

it will only be parlayed into a memory

Nice isn't it? My greatest fear upon embarking on this journey is that my unsophisticated nature will result in my inadvertently causing offence to the Japanese people in a thousand different ways without realising it and that they will be too polite to inform me. I also fear that I may be further alienated from the locals by my tattoo which they associate with Yakuza membership. I have read that foreigners are advised to cover any tattoos with bandages to ensure admission to various places. I will test the waters with bare forearms first to determine the extent to which I will cause offence.

            I have already had one experience of extreme Japanese humility before even leaving Cork. One hotel I booked emailed me in broken English to very politely and unclearly ask for clarification on one point, and upon providing said clarification, they thanked me profusely and apologised for quote "wasting your precious time" with their unworthy query.

            I should introduce you all to a new character in this blog. Her name is Noride, she's my sister and she will be tagging along on this adventure, no doubt being a source of great irritation to me and to you. Not being as tenacious, resilient or cultured as my good self, she will surely spend most of my holiday bickering and complaining and generally lowering the otherwise very civilised tone of my experience. I usually travel alone and this major change will no doubt alter the manner in which strangers will relate to me as I will no longer be a mysterious lone rider. I am sure that this journey will make it clear for the future whether mystery or company is superior and that is an experiment I am willing to conduct once.

            For now though, my sights are set firmly on the now familiar Special Autonomous Region of Hong Kong which I am very much looking forward to seeing again, as you can imagine if you have read the last few entries. I will once again be staying with Leah, given how gracious a host she was in September. Soon I will be soaking up the neon, strolling through glittering glass canyons and eating Cantonese food again! Yung sing!